Monday, August 16, 2010

five : your soul is searching ecstacy, but I don't want your body.

song: we don't want your body by stars

*Jade’s POV*

“Stop pointing that stupid stick at me,” I said, rolling my eyes, “I am staying over here. I already said I won't rape you. You don't need to use a piece of a tree as a weapon.”

Jacob was on one side of the car, holding this 12-inch piece of a branch like a weapon.

“How do I know that if I drop this you won't jump me?” he asked, narrowing his eyes.

“Because I'm not interested in jumping you...at the moment.” I replied, holding up my phone. “I hate Rogers!”

I heard a rustling and saw him grab a second wimpy stick, “At the moment? What does that mean?”

I thought for a moment, then replied, “If you must know, I'm on my period.”

Clearly disgusted but relieved, Jacob dropped both sticks.

“...but only until tomorrow.” I added, giving him a mischievous grin. I loved toying with him; everything seemed to freak him out, like a pre-pubescent girl.

“Oh, great.” He wandered to the front and jumped on the hood of the car, lying down and gazing at the sky.

“What is with you, anyway?” I asked, walking over to stand by him, slowly of course, “Most guys would love to just do a girl and not need anything more. Let me guess: you're gay.”

Jacob shrugged, “Not all guys are like that.”

I crossed my arms and leaned against the car, “Then what are you like?”

“I respect girls.”

I snorted, “Pfft, yeah ok. You’re probably a virgin, too.”

My last comment was oozing with sarcasm, but Jacob didn’t seem to catch it, “So what if I am?”

I raised my eyebrows, “You're 19! You're young! You're really well-built- I mean, live your life, man!”

Jacob folded his arms around his chest, “I still haven’t found the right girl.”

Oh god, we had a Cupid’s arrow believer, “The right girl to lose it to? Please. Don't tell me you believe in that lovey-dovey soulmate crap.”

Jacob sat up and glared at me, “I don't need to sleep with every single girl that gives me the time of day.”

“Look, I'm not saying that at all. I'm saying that if it's love you're looking for, you're crazy.”

“Just because whatever is going on between your friend and that Taylor guy isn’t working, doesn't mean love doesn't exist.”

“Don’t even go there,” I snapped, getting up in his face, “That, is not love. Maybe Lena has it, but he certainly doesn’t, not even an ounce of respect, either.”

“Why don’t you believe in love?” Jacob asked, “Just curious. I get that you’re about random sex because it’s some kind of protest...”

I sighed, “I had a guy that I was engaged to, way back when. We were young and stupid. I was stupid. Long story short he left and knocked up some girl and married her.”

Jacob was quiet for a moment. He sat up and looked at me; really for the first time our eyes met. His were such a bright blue, especially in the sun, I was taken with them for a few seconds.

“Jade, I’m sorry, I didn’t know.”

“It’s fine, I’m over it.”

We were quiet for a moment.

“Have you ever been in love?”

Jacob bit his lip, “No. Not yet. But my brother, he's been with his girlfriend for a few years now, and the way they talk about each other, the way they look at each other, I've seen it in my parents...”

I nodded, “They're lucky that way, I guess. Maybe some of us just aren't meant to fall in love and stay in it.”

“It happens, but it seems your friend really likes that Taylor guy, maybe even loves him.”

I could feel my face grow red with anger, “What he gives to her is anything but love. Doesn't return her calls, sleezes around and then apologizes later...I cannot tell you how angry I was when he put the mark on her arm.”

Jacob looked shocked, “I saw that...what is it?”

I rubbed my kneecaps, “Well, first of all- I'd like to sit in the car, next to you, because I'm tired of standing.” I paused. “Can you trust me?”

Jacob slid off the roof, “I guess so.”

We walked to either door and got in the backseat. I crossed my legs over his so I could lean against the seat comfortably. Jacob gave me a look that said, ‘Go right ahead and make yourself comfortable, then,’ and I smirked at him; my dirty purple Converse laces hanging in mid-air.

“Taylor has a nasty temper, and he usually resorts to verbally hurting Lena when he's mad,” I explained, “But one night, a month ago, he got so angry he picked her up and threw her right into his trophy case. The glass broke and she wound up in the hospital.”

Jacob was quiet. My could feel the frustration building up as I thought of the countless nights I’d had to drop in and save her from him.

“I wanted to charge him with assault, and we were going to- until he showed up, apologized in the most fake way possible, and she told me not to.”

Jacob touched my arm gently, “It’s not his apologies, she still loves him, despite everything.”

“I guess so,” I groaned, “He hurts her all the time, he treats her like shit. He's her first boyfriend....I am getting sick of it. How many more beatings will it take before it’s too late...?”

In spite of myself, I was crying. Really crying. I’d held it back for so long that now I was letting it all go, in front of this complete stranger I had just met. I felt sick and sad and sorry for it, for Lena and for myself. I withdrew my legs and leaned against the window in a pathetic little ball.

“She'll be fine, she's lucky to have you...” I felt Jacob’s arms awkwardly hug me. His touch was warm and soft, and safe. I don’t know why, but unwound myself and turned to look at him. The sun was pained through the window and hitting his eyes perfectly; making the blue mix with the bit of green.

“You...you have really pretty eyes...” I managed to stutter.

He frowned, “Umm...thank you...”

In a sudden fit of passion, I jumped on him, pushing him down against the seat and pressing my mouth against his. I grasped onto his large shoulders, kissing him hard. After several seconds he parted his lips and gently pushed me off.

“Jade...is this really appropriate?”

I suddenly felt very embarrassed, “ I...I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me...”

Jacob blushed beneath me, “It's okay...it was just a little...unexpected...”

I sunk down in the seat, “Sorry, I don’t usually kiss guys...it must have been horrible.”

Jacob suppressed a laugh, “It definitely wasn’t horrible.”

“What?”

He blushed, “It wasn’t.” Jacob looked very uncomfortable pinned beneath me.

“Nevermind. I’m sorry.” I paused. “Actually, I’m not.”

“Jade!” Jacob cried out, holding me back, “Why?”

I blinked at him, “You should know I haven’t kissed a guy in ages.”

Catching him at a second of weakness, I took advantage and took to his mouth again. When he didn’t fight back, I withdrew. He gave me a small guilt-ridden grin.

Jacob’s face flushed, “You sure you don’t do this more often?”

“What? No,” I replied, trailing kisses down his jawline, “Why do you ask?”

Jacob fought the urge to moan, “Mmmph...what about all those guys you talked about?”

To my pleasure, I could feel him springing to life below me.

“I never kissed them,” I explained, inhaling the scent of his neck, “You smell good.”

Jacob’s hands gently rested on my hips. I planted small kisses along his neck before I decided to get a little bit dirtier and sucked on his neck. He immediately reacted and pulled away instantly.

“Vad gör jag?!” Jacob groaned, rubbing his neck and getting out of the car.

“Geez, you can hardly see it,” I shrugged, “You’re being a child.”

Jacob knelt by the side mirror, frowning at the mark, “Bajs!”

“English!”

“Stay away from me,” Jacob said sternly, “I’m not like you. I’m not interested.”

Before I could spit my witty reply, we both heard a weird noise. I glanced over my shoulder, seeing in the surrounding forestry, some sort of dog. Naturally curious, I walked towards it, Jacob following close behind. The dog growled and ran across the road, leaving some animal behind.

A tiny ball of fluff, walking like he was drunk (more like rolling), quacking at us through ruffled feathers.

“It’s a baby duck!” I exclaimed.

Jacob frowned, “Don’t touch it!”

Ignoring him, I scooped the duckling up in my hands, “Hello little guy!”

The duck quacked at me contently, nibbling on my jacket. Jacob sighed.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“He’s adorable,” I said, squealing with delight, “I’m naming him Gary.”

“Don’t name it, you’ll get attached.”

“I already am,” I sighed, “Little ball of joy.”

“Little what?”

Lena, back from her trek to the gas station, raised her eyebrows, “Jade...put it down...it could have a disease.”

“He’s harmless,” I assured her, “I’m keeping him.”

“No, you’re not,” Lena insisted, “Anton and I were able to get some gas, thank God for credit cards.”

“Whatever,” I waved it off, “He can sit on my lap until we get to a nice little duck pond.”

“Um, we’re not getting to a nice little duck pond!” Lena replied, “We’re getting back to Saskatoon, remember?” She glanced at Jacob. “Oh, my god...really, Jade?”

Jacob nervously covered his neck with his hand, “Hmm?”

She shook her head at me, “Do you have to have sex with every male you meet?”

“We didn’t have sex, ok?” I put Gary down, “We just made out in the back-”

“The duck bit me,” Jacob cut in, “Seriously.”

“The duck’s staying behind,” Lena told me, “For sure now.”

“IT’S THE DUCK OR ME!”

“You’re so dramatic,” Lena rolled her eyes just as Anton left the car and walked over to us, “Got it filled up?”

“Yes, we’re all set,” Anton replied, “Nice hickey.”

“Not a hickey.” Jacob snapped.

“It’s a definitely a hickey.”

“No, it’s not.” Jacob said, glaring down at his best friend.

Anton shrugged, “Ok, it’s not.”